In an online poll conducted by Divorce Magazine, 29% of respondents said that infidelity had caused their divorce; 22% blamed the marital split on communication problems; 15% said that the problem was basic incompatibility; and 14% cited emotional or physical abuse. Other reasons included drug addiction, financial woes, and one spouse being a workaholic.

Helping you help yourself,

According to Divorce Magazine, there are seven stages that some people going through a divorce experience:

1. Panic: A sudden and overwhelming fear of the divorce process itself and the outcomes it’ll have on your life.
2. Denial: Disbelief that your marriage is going to end or has ended.
3. Agony: Prolonged emotional pain and suffering as a result of the divorce.
4. Rage: Feelings of anger either towards your ex or yourself.
5. Epiphany: Gaining a sudden intuitive grasp of reality through divorce.
6. Negotiation: The process of compromise.
7. Peace: A state of tranquility or quiet.

Helping you help yourself,

Many separated or divorced people seem to be deferring their happiness until they achieve certain goals. We tell ourselves, “I’ll be happy when my divorce is finalized,” “I’ll be happy when I get custody of the kids,” “I’ll be happy when I finally meet that one person in the world who’s right for me.”

Dr. Barbara De Angelis, a relationship therapist, calls this behaviour the “I’ll be happy when…” Syndrome; we sabotage our happiness by postpoing it until some outside event or occurance changes our lives forever. The truth, however, is that happiness is not an acquisition, it’s a skill. It’s not about what we get or experience, it’s about the way we live our lives every day. We can get things we thought would make us happy, such as a house, a spouse, the kids, but we’re not going to be any happier because happiness isn’t dependent on the outside.

Helping you help yourself,

Source: Divorce Magazine